Creating a Life of Meaning & Purpose After Service
First, a definition of terms
I’ve tentatively titled the draft of my book, “The Art of Being A Veteran,” with the subtitle, “How to Build a Life of Meaning and Purpose After Service.” But what do words like meaning and purpose even mean?
So to make it easier for readers, I thought it would be helpful to define these concepts upfront. That way we can understand why meaning and purpose are important, and how they work together.
Who cares about meaning and purpose?
In the story of human existence, two plot lines drive nearly everything we do: meaning and purpose. These two fundamental concepts shape how we see the world, influence our behavior and ultimately define our psychological well-being.
As we head out on this journey together, it's worth delving into precisely what the words purpose and meaning mean, so we can better understand their nuances and nature (and why you should care).
Understanding Meaning
I often think of meaning as a proverbial flare shot into a desert sky that illuminates our lives with a sense of significance and coherence. Meaning speaks to our human desire to make sense of our existence. From a psychological standpoint, meaning is the subjective interpretation of your experiences, actions, and relationships.
The Personal Interpretation
Meaning is inherently personal since it arises from the unique landscape of your beliefs, values, and experiences. It is a cognitive and emotional construct that emerges when you connect your actions (and thoughts about those actions) to the broader context of your life. It encompasses the stories you tell yourself, the goals you pursue, and the values you hold dear.
Coherence and Significance
At its core, meaning grants coherence — a logical and consistent interpretation — to your life story, offering a sense of order, continuity, and purpose. It helps you to understand the relationship between various events and circumstances, weaving them into a meaningful whole.
Additionally, meaning infuses your endeavors with significance, instilling a profound sense of value and worthiness.
Finding coherence and significance after war is a lifelong struggle for many combat veterans. For others, we found logic and consistency (coherence) and a strong sense of value and worthiness in our military service itself. Thus leaving the service can cause a real meaning crisis, and the worst part can be that you never saw it coming.
Sources of Meaning
Meaning can be derived from various sources. For some, it may stem from fulfilling family relationships (parenting is a huge source of meaning for most parents), serving others (think clergy or teachers), or pursuing work that aligns with your values. Others may find meaning through creative expressions such as art or writing, spiritual practices, or engaging in acts of kindness and compassion. The key to those activities, connections, or beliefs is that they resonate deeply within you and provide a profound sense of purpose.
The Essence of Purpose
Speaking of purpose: While meaning illuminates the path of your existence, purpose empowers you to embark upon it with intention and drive. Purpose is the force that powers you forward, infusing your actions with a sense of direction and fulfillment.
From a psychological perspective, purpose can be defined as the underlying motivation that drives your pursuits and directs your life'slife's trajectory.
A Guiding North Star
Purpose serves as your compass, guiding your choices and actions toward a higher goal or ideal. It transcends mere survival and the pursuit of pleasure, calling upon you to make meaningful contributions, leave a lasting impact, or embody deeply held principles. It endows your life with direction and provides a sense of fulfillment, even in the face of adversity.
Alignment and Flow
When your actions align with your purpose, you feel a state of harmonious flow arise. Flow feels like a seamless fusion of engagement, skill, and intrinsic motivation, where time seems to lose its grip, and you are wholly immersed in the present moment. Many of us feel flow when playing sports, creating music or doing something we're very skilled and passionate about.
Purpose catalyzes this immersive experience; it enhances your performance, creativity, and overall well-being.
Purpose: The Compass of Your Story
Finding your purpose (which we’ll talk about more in-depth in the chapter on Life Purpose) often starts with pursuing meaningful experiences; in an ever-renewing cycle, your sense of purpose then infuses your actions with deeper meaning.
Meaning and purpose complement and enhance each other, forming a symbiotic relationship that fuels psychological well-being.
A Catalyst for Flourishing
Pursuing a meaningful life fuels motivation, resilience, and a sense of self-worth. Simultaneously, a clear sense of purpose provides a roadmap, propelling you through challenges and nurturing a deep sense of fulfillment and satisfaction.
When meaning and purpose intertwine, a powerful synergy emerges, facilitating psychological flourishing — the true Art of Being A Veteran.
How to Nurture a Life of Meaningful Purpose
To cultivate a life rich in meaning and purpose, you must align your actions with your core values and beliefs. This is what this book is all about.
Seek out experiences that resonate with your deepest desires and contribute to the well-being of yourself and others. Foster connections with individuals who support and share your aspirations, and explore avenues that allow your strengths and passions to flourish.
An Always-Evolving Journey
You'reYou're never done. The quest for meaning and purpose is not a destination where you arrive but an ongoing, ever-changing adventure. So embrace the fluidity of your life, and remain open to new insights, experiences, and possibilities.
Allow yourself the freedom to redefine and refine your understanding of meaning and purpose as you navigate the ebb and flow of experiences, relationships and values. As you reflect upon how you'd like to cultivate more meaning and purpose in your life, recognize their power to transform you.
Meaning gives you coherence and significance, while purpose propels you forward with intention and accomplishment. Embrace the graceful interplay between these fundamental concepts, because within their dance lies the key to unlocking the life you were meant to live.